My Soul's journey over many lives to God Realization and the lessons I learned along the way

The Book

Soul to God

We are Soul  (Continued)

Every heart feels the pull of God whether it recognizes this consciously or not. For those of us in the waking process, we experience a divine discontent. This growing discontent drives us to challenge preconceived notions held by society. A persistent, inner voice calls us to awaken—awaken to our calling, awaken to our God-Self.

This inner voice is like a mother stirring its child from a deep slumber. She bends down to whisper, "It's time to wake now." Our sleepy eyes blink open to see her divine face. She encourages us to remember why we've come here—what we agreed to do. After lifetimes of slumber, it's time to begin a new day—our Day of God. It's time to awaken to a new world, to a deeper truth, which can't be spoken or written. This profound truth can only be experienced in Soul awareness when we venture beyond all that we've known and believed, to surrender to a timeless calling, to learn how to enter into a deep, spiritual oneness with God. This truth encompasses all truths, holds all 
realities, and is the fabric of all universes.

For those in this waking process, 
truth sounds familiar, like the deep reverberating gong of an ancient Tibetan bell. We feel the Divine pulling at our hearts and ancient memories stir. Insights come to us that seem strangely familiar. Life is nudging us forward, encouraging us to enter into the next stage of our journey home. We step out of what once was, onto a path that mystically pulls us along. Our pace quickens as the long path winds through dry deserts and wild rivers, over mountains and through forests towards an open vista. We've shed all karma and fears along the way. Like old, tattered garments, everything that once protected us but is no longer needed, drops away. Our curiosity is piqued. We feel refreshed—renewed.  

We intuitively still our heart and mind to enter in the Now—to allow the Knower to become one with the Known. Stepping out of the forest, we view an amazing scene. An ageless ocean of light greets us. It knows us and loves us deeply. It greets us as one of Its own. Our faults have no meaning in this realm. It's wisdom runs too deep to find fault. We judged ourselves and others from a limited state of being. All that is gone now. All of our burdens have dropped away. Embraced, we become suspended within Its divine bliss and transcendent love. The Great Compassion fills us. Our heart marries with The Divine's heart. Filled with this ocean of light, we marvel how effortless we love every being within all the universes because it's our nature to love.  We are this ocean of love, wisdom, and mercy. We are God-in-disguise. As Soul, we've worn a cloak of a separate identity from God for all these lifetimes. We've journeyed through many worlds for eons of time, to return home with the wisdom of ages. 

Our entire journey was a gift from a perfect heart to help us become spiritual adults. We once envisioned this as the end of our timeless journey. Now we clearly see that we have arrived at a new beginning. We've entered into an entirely new realm of evolution where we must re-enter life to act and maintain our being more consciously 
in God, to become the teachers and guides for those still on the journey. Divine winds fill our sails again to propel us forward into new adventures, in loving service to our brothers and sisters-of-the-journey. Our evolution continues—and in truth—never ends.

Each of us is on this path. There are countless souls ahead of us, behind us, and beside us. Highly evolved souls have been assigned to guide each of us, ancient spiritual friends. They are always near, speaking to us in ways we don't always comprehend. They work to implant ideas, bring about coincidences, link people to us and help pave our way. We are never alone.

As you read this book, I'm beside you now—a fellow traveler. We are walking together on this journey home. Let me speak to you as we walk, entertain you with stories that enlighten and ease the miles.

Let me begin by saying your viewpoint is sacred to me. I wouldn’t change it. But I would invite you to open your mind while reading this book, to escape your life for a few hours by giving yourself permission to tune into a deep state of stillness. In that stillness rests the Source of all life, all love, all intelligence. In that stillness can spring an organic form of change the happens within the deepest part of us, then grows outward to manifest a more fulfilling, happier life—a friendlier universe.

The spiritual strength and guidance we long for is a heartbeat away. We just need to get-the-knack of relaxing our conscious mind to tune into the wisdom of higher thought—to tweak the dials of our perception to experience the consciousness of saints. It is possible to transcend thought and opinion, to enter into a state of pure being and knowing. This book is made up of stories about that experience and is intended to act as a meditation—a spiritual exercise in exploring your unique path to the Divine. The road we share is long, and we have much to talk about.

Our Divine Story
We live within an agreed upon reality defined by fears, prejudices, limited information, restricted ability to reason, desire for community, and need to regulate our society. As a species, our impulse is to organize this chaos. Throughout history, communities have created Divine Stories to give meaning to life on Earth and to provide guidelines for social behavior. According to Wikipedia, there are roughly 4,200 religions in the world. Within each religion, there are are many private interpretations. We modify our ancestral beliefs as we grow and learn. For instance, I was surprised to discover that my Roman Catholic parents had evolved beliefs outside their religion. In their late seventies, my mother confessed that she believed in reincarnation, but couldn't believe in karma. My dad, who was sitting at the table when my mother shared this viewpoint for the first time, was taken back. He then confessed that he believed in karma, but not in reincarnation. In my eyes, they were a perfect match, one balancing the other. So within our community's Divine Story, we individually evolve our own Divine Story as our spiritual growth outstrips the larger communities ability to evolve. This is an evolutionary process. Souls eventually evolve beyond the limited group viewpoint to finally enter into an understanding that does not separate through fear and ignorance, but embraces the whole in a detached, mature, compassionate wisdom and love—a God's eye view of life. 

Einstein once said, "The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe." We can see many believe they live in a hostile universe. They are caught up in alienation, war, and fear of people from different nations, faiths, ethnicities, sexual orientations, and backgrounds. Their innate response is to alienate those that they fear, seek power over those they feel threatened by, and manipulate societal laws to acquire control, wealth, and power. They seek physical security through the acquisition of wealth, and emotional security by associating with similar, closed-minded individuals. They enjoy a false spiritual security within their religion, loving those who agree with them, while condemning those who look, feel, think, and act differently.   

I believe the world is now going through the process of evolving beyond these difficult-teenage-years as large Soul populations grow into spiritual adults. We see the negative, fearful side becoming more agitated, as the positive, more inclusive side becomes favored, more free and expressive. The old society feels threatened by people who believe differently than they do. The more people that were in their club, the more secure they felt. Now that people are leaving their club, they feel a loss of power and control—and fear for their future. We see a dramatic polarization of societies throughout the world which, I believe, will be eventually resolved within this evolutionary process.

This process of evolution is not accidental. We have been genetically designed to evolve through the use of our binocular brain. Binocular is a term usually reserved for vision; two eyes provide two viewpoints to afford us depth perception. We can accurately calculate where an object is in space in relation to our body. 

Our human brain could be thought of as binocular also. Similar to our vision, our brain provides binocular views for interpreting our environment and who we are. We have two very distinct brains, a left, and right hemisphere, that have two very different views on life. Our dominant left hemisphere brain tends to see the world as hostile and threatening. Its focus is on the past and expected future. It can not process the present moment without referencing its past and predicted future. It can handle only a tiny fraction of reality, yet believes it sees the whole clearly. It makes up our ego, our sense of identity, and can sometimes border on being stupid. This narrow view of life helps us focus on the task at hand and accomplish wonderful things. It helps us create the world in which we live. This part of our brain, however, has spiritual-tunnel-vision. It was not designed to perceive the present accurately or higher spiritual realities. It was designed to function in time and space, a four-dimensional reality, to provide a context to learn how to work and manifest our dreams. Soul's challenge is to grow beyond an egocentric world of alienation, the me-them syndrome, into an awareness of Its connection and responsibility to God and all life. In doing so, It becomes able to appreciate other points of view and find 
compromise in working towards building a better world.

Our Lifeline from Source
Humans have been thrown a lifeline from the heavenly worlds. Our right brains appear to be hard-wired to our higher consciousness self and God. This lifeline from Source links us to our divine purpose and Soul awareness. Its focus is on the present moment—which one could argue—is all there is. We lived our past in a present moment, and will live our future in a present moment. In the deepest sense of reality—all life happens within an eternal Now. But our left brain gets confused here because it needs to organize time and events sequentially to function. Its perception of time dominates our Earthly experience. Like my parents seemingly opposing viewpoints, our two brains combine to make an efficient team, able to learn from its past and plan a future, while embracing a deeper wisdom and connection to God within the present.

If we block our left brain perspective for a moment and view life through our right brain, we live in a friendly universe. We don't feel alienated from others or God because we intuitively experience Soul awareness. We tap into deep levels of creativity that inspire works of creation outstripping our limited past. The conservative world often devalues, and even ignores, our right brain's abilities to add meaning to life, to experience bliss, joy, compassion, and love. These attributes add no value to its bottom line. It fears an evolution beyond itself. 

We function best by paying attention to both parents of evolution, our right and left brains. We can be mindful of the lessons of the past, while opening pathways for communication with our higher-self, embracing a sense of sacred oneness with others and God. The left-brain sense of separation and need to dominate through fear has ruled humankind since its prehistoric beginning. A new age is upon us. It's time for balance, allowing the sacred to work through us in every way. This new path can bring peace on Earth.

Our minds are not the originator of thought as once believed. Our brain acts more like a radio, able to receive different frequencies of thought from an endless field of consciousness. Our life is shaped by our environment, upbringing, and by any karma brought forward by Soul to create our life lesson path. Thought patterns are chemically imprinted in our physical brain simultaneously creating a signature link to our etheric sub-mind (subconscious mind). These create habits of thinking and perception. We activate these streams of thought simply by placing our attention on them. The thought pattern is immediately activated, and we find ourselves on the hamster wheel of that thought pattern, which can repeat itself many times a day. 

We've all noticed our tendency to think the same thoughts over and over through the day. Thought patterns can become like 
ruts in a frequently traveled dirt road.  Our thinking tends to fall into these ruts whenever we go down-that-road. Soul intelligence within us can break up these thought patterns. We can experience new thoughts, appreciate new viewpoints, and incorporate new thinking into our lives. 

Most of us don't realize we have the ability to reach into more sophisticated levels of integrative thought. Higher frequency thinking is more interconnected and logical. It's imbued with spiritual wisdom. Lower frequency thought supports less integrated, has more conflicted perceptions, often based on fear. Higher thought can create harmonies such as music, poetry, art, and a more integrative, holistic science. 

Our saints had the gift of being able to tune into thought frequencies that most of us don’t experience on a daily basis. Those who know how to reach beyond their ego, to pray humbly, can do the same.

Prayer and Meditation
Prayer is talking to God. Meditation is listening to God. We need both for a healthy relationship. If we talk all the time and don't listen, we miss the guidance being offered and slow our spiritual growth. If we listen without talking, we become passive and fail to reach our full potential as creative beings. We need to combine the prayerful traditions of the West with the meditative practices of the East to become whole and balanced.

Our calling is to become the fullest expression of our unique, divine being. It's best to pray, meditate—and then create. It's best to dream the best that we can dream, and then be flexible enough to allow God to give us something better. Life works best when we recognize our divine guidance and are brave enough to act on that advice. To express the Divine is to evolve into fuller expressions of ourselves. We'll be healthier and happier. Our world will no longer be based on fear, but upon a love and wisdom that rests within the greater creative resources of our being. 

When we meditate, we learn how to still the habitual, repetitious thoughts of our left brain's monkey-mind to tune into subtle frequencies. Prayer and meditation can tweak the radio dial from its regular, preset stations to receive frequencies many of us don’t readily receive. In fact, most of Earth’s population is unaware of their ability to play with the radio dials of their conscious perception so that they can remember their past lives, tap into ground-breaking insights, and experience a healing, transforming, life energy.

Mental Filters
We each have mental filters that distort our perception of reality. Some of the filters are there to protect us—we are born with them. For instance, most people don’t remember their past lives because those memories would not serve them. Memory blocks were placed before we incarnated to be removed only when we are prepared to remember. Many memories are not constructive to growth until the Soul is stable in its environment and needs further information to proceed spiritually. In the final stages of our evolution, it becomes necessary to remember and heal from this life and all past lives, to remember and forgive everyone—especially Self.

Many of our mental filters are man-made, subconscious programs. We create these programs both consciously and unconsciously to protect us from a threatening world. These self-created programs are defense mechanisms designated to protect a false ego—our illusionary self. They also create a feeling of separation between our perceived self—and God. When these filters are suspended—even for a few moments—we can then see there is no separation between God and ourselves. This is a delightful, life transforming experience and at the core of many profound spiritual experiences.

These mental filters are like blinders on a plow horse; they block our peripheral vision helping us focus on the task at hand. They also block our spiritual memory, reduce awareness of a higher truth, inhibit dream recall, propel us towards belief in fear and alienation, and drive us deeper into escapes like addictions to food, sex, power, alcohol and drugs. The list of problems these mental filters cause is almost endless—but so are the solutions.

It’s possible to evolve to a state where we no longer need to have our filters active all the time, to protect a false ego. Once our false ego begins to dissolve, many defense mechanisms fall away on their own allowing us to experience a deeper peace and connection to God with a natural impulse to love life. I’ll help you recognize which filters are necessary and serve you, and which ones you can begin to deprogram, so they no longer interfere with achieving your life’s contracted goals. One of the most important deprogramming skills is learning how to forgive, to let the past hurts be reframed and their influence on our life dissolved.

Exciting new techniques in hypnotherapy have evolved that can lower these subconscious filters under hypnosis, allowing us to experience an awareness of ourselves as an immortal soul, with memories of our past lives, and our life between lives. Hypnotherapy can be a useful experience to help us open up in ways our conscious mind is unable to. In fact, with the assistance of a competent spiritual hypnotherapist, it's possible for us to have a conversation with our higher self, our guides, and our lost loved ones. This experience of temporally having our mental filters suspended is a blissful, sacred experience. Hypnotherapy can be a tool to understand, reframe, and forgive the past so that we can live in a more energized, healthy present. We can also do this self-work on our own with some guidance. In truth, there are no shortcuts. We must do the work ourselves. We must lift our own weights to gain the strength we need for the journey ahead, and drop the weights that are unnecessary and have been slowing us down. We will then become strong and free.

My Life Story
I’ve always experienced life a bit differently than most. For instance, I've never feared death because I remember dying so many times and know what comes afterward. I know that I'm Soul, having his human experience. At two years of age, I recalled my life between lives, my friends and teachers before I incarnated, and how rewarding our work was. Those memories stuck with me but made life very uncomfortable. I felt like I was trapped in a dark world and was homesick for the higher realms. At five, I began suffering from frequent nightmares of a violent past life death. At twelve, I started having past life memories of my life in Tibetan Monasteries, Japan, and India. I’ve learned to hide my abilities and experiences so that I blended in. I was quiet, careful only to share what others were prepared to understand. I realized that they were not experiencing the same thoughts and love. Otherwise, it would be impossible for them to be cruel and not care about all life. 

I chose to keep my abilities and experiences under wrap until the time came when I was comfortable, and I felt more confident that the world was ready to listen. I'm not completely comfortable with sharing now, or convinced that I'm the right person to be doing this. I'd much prefer someone like Wayne Dyer or Deepak Chopra write this book. I feel like I'm a bit under-sized for this task, quiet and less well spoken. But I’ve kicked-the-can-down-the-road long enough. As Wayne advised, we need to share while the music is still in us. I don’t think I would be able to leave this world comfortably without writing this book. In a way, this book completes my life.

While reading Soul to God, I invite you to relax deeply into a stillness within and experience the quiet presence of a friendly being. Pay attention to the subtle inner nudges, and ideas that occur to you. Be bold enough to experiment, test your inner guidance, giving it a chance to prove itself. Don’t worry about where you are spiritually. Avoid comparing yourself to others and don’t be concerned about what you don't know. Be confident that what you need to know will come to you in its own time. Relax and grow naturally from where you are. You are in the most critical place and time—you are Here-NOW. Your path is unique—and you are unique. Rest in that.

The stories in Soul to God are not meant to convince you of my viewpoint. They are intended to entertain and be contemplations. They are not an accurate history of my life or lives. They are my honest personal perspective, and as such, personal viewpoints are always skewed by the observer. But my deepest belief is that I’m not the real observer. I believe God is the true observer through our eyes. That’s the point of this book, to begin to see through the eyes of God and feel through Its heart.  

At heart, I am a skeptic and take everyone and everything with a grain-of-salt. I have deeply ingrained memories of my life as a Tibetan Buddhist Monk growing up in a Lhasa Monastery in the fourteenth century. As a part of our study, we participated in sport-like debates in an outdoor courtyard to deepen our comprehension of Buddhist doctrine in order to advance in our studies. I loved the sport of debate and was good at it. I later became a Lama instructing debate traditions to young monks. 

Within these debate exercises, I taught my students how to think logically, to challenge all viewpoints, especially their own. I emphasized that we take nothing for granted in our efforts to open wide the doors to comprehension and clear perspective. I believed these open doors led to the enlightened state—Nirvana. I confess that I did not reach Nirvana in that lifetime, much to my frustration on my death bed. My last thoughts in that life were that I must use my future lives to explore other paths to realize the one, unnamed path that leads to the final liberation. Some five centuries later, here I am writing this book after experiencing lives as a Shinto Monk, Zen Buddhist, Hindu guru and pilgrim, a Hasidic Jew, a Sikh, and Christian. I never dreamed the Final Liberation I'd imagined in Tibet was just the beginning of another stage in the ongoing evolution of Soul.

The reason I’ve waited so long in writing this book is that I am that Tibetan Lama skeptic who challenges all—including himself. I see things from my viewpoint while deeply appreciating differing views. I don't assume that my position is entirely accurate or the final word, so I'm very careful in expressing my ideas. I was born with an ingrained, almost fierce, need to challenge any viewpoint that appears illogical. In my Senior year at a private, all-boys, college-prep Catholic High School, I got wind that the teaching Jesuit Brothers had created a list of trouble makers. Most of the list consisted of students who had been in fights or suspected of petty crimes. My friend, who had seen the list while he was assisting a brother in the office, told me that I was number six on the list. The Brothers’ complaint was that I openly challenged Catholic doctrine in Religion classes. I smiled when my friend told me this and inwardly thought, "YES!" Being on that list was a badge of honor to me. I dared challenge the prejudices of the status quo.

There comes a time in a person's life when they respectfully set aside the viewpoints of others to claim the freedom to express one's truth—and let the chips-fall-where-they-may. I realize my life stories are a bit fantastic. The coincidences seem implausible. One reason I’ve waited so long to write this book is that I wanted to get out of writing it. I felt that, if I were in your place, I’d find these stories too difficult to believe. I saw other, more capable spiritual teachers saying about the same thing in a more elegant way. I reasoned, my voice was unnecessary. Why risk exposing myself?

But that was an excuse—a delay tactic. I’m sixty-five, and I won’t be around forever—so here it is, Soul to God. I remember starting to write this book when I was seven. I had about ten pages done when my mother asked me what I was writing. I told her I was writing an important story about my life. She asked me how the story ended? I responded, “I don’t know—but I can’t wait to find out!” She laughed, and I realized that I didn’t have a clear plan for the book, only a trust and a sense that I had to write it. All my life, I’ve felt like I needed to document all the miracles that happened to me—not to impress or seek attention, but to share and invite the reader to discover the divine in their life.

And so, 58 years later, I'm again setting out to work on this book with a trust in God and some help from above. I’m uncomfortable calling attention to myself. I’ve always preferred to be quiet and work in the background, to channel spirit to others without them knowing. Now, I’m being asked to step up and share my thoughts, and stories of my lives, both inner and outer. I remember my guide, Cho-mon, saying to me, “We didn’t put all this work into your life for just you."


Life-Nuggets after each chapter are take-away points. Like a prospector panning for gold, pick out the valuable nuggets you want to keep then drop them into your pouch. They’ll serve you well on your journey home. 

  • We are Soul, temporarily identifying ourselves as human. We are linked to the Divine throughout all our lifetimes and are growing towards becoming a God Conscious Being. 
  • We each have a Divine Story that will one day expand to embrace all Divine Stories. We will eventually evolve beyond the illusion of separation form others and Source, into a God’s Eye love of life.
  • We’ve been given a lifeline from Source. Our right brain is hard-wired into our higher consciousness self and God-Self.
  • We each have mental filters that both distort and help focus our perception of reality. Once we understand how these filters were created, we can modify them, solving many of our life problems.
  • The stories in Soul to God are not meant to convince you of my viewpoint. They are intended to entertain and be contemplations for charting your own path to the Divine.

Next: Read Chapter One

Copyright 2016. Soul to All rights reserved. Soul to God. First Edition © 2016. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever, including Internet usage, without written permission from Balboa Press except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.